it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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