Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
