sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
