too bad you live with your parents still
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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