3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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