whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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