Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
