when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Randomize
