i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
