he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
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