Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
