i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Randomize
