Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
