Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize
