Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Randomize
