Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Found your dick twin last night
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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