it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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