Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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