god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
His nipple licking is glorious
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