Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
