i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Randomize