When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
