You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
