is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Randomize
