yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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