I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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