It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize