He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
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