Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
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