Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
Randomize
