You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
So, my ex just showed me the drunk voicemail we left him last night. Started out with me saying "I think it's Shane." Then you took my phone and started singing a song about peanut butter, train tracks, and tequila. I joined in. On the upside, he said he's totally fine with being on the drunk dial list from now on. Soooo, another tequila night??
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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