Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Randomize
