I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
