If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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