Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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