this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Randomize
