maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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