Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize
