i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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