sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
She even gives head with a lisp.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
