dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
