I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
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