It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
home. puking in laundry basket.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Randomize
