i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
