No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
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