Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize