I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
