goodnight i made you a song goodbye
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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