Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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