Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize