I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Four minutes until I can fart!
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
